This weekend's goal:

Try various recipes to find which Chocolate Chip Banana Muffins recipe I like best. :o)

For the first time in a long time...

Does that even make sense??!?!?

ANYWHO, I'm actually EXCITED about the ACL lineup!! It does help that my all time fa and will be there. I wish it was ll 5 members of DMB, but I know leRoi will be there in spirit. Pearl Jam, Kings of Leon (whom I listen to every day n the way home) John Legend (swoon) Mos Def, Toadies, Coheed and Cambria and The Scabs are among the few, I'm interested in seeing. I think that most of my friends don't like some of the ppl I've listed so it'll be tough for me to make the decision to go if I'm going to be hanging out alone. I also need to convince Jason that I want to go b/c I KNOW he won't go so that means abandoning my child for a couple of days. :o(

Either way, the prospect of going is EXCITING!

Backed Up Day 2

So basically all day yesterday was spent trying to find the main line of our piping. FINALLY it was found and it was discovered that tree roots had grown into the piping causing it to clog. So it was decided to reroute the piping which entailed digging a 3 foot trench along the side of the driveway. The only problem?? It's dirt on the surface. PURE ROCK underneath. Those poor guys worked until 9:00pm. 

Here's the trench with the piping that will eventually go into it...


And here's the tub after the water eventually drained out. Don't ask me what the residue left behind is. I'm scared to find out...


So the guys were supposed to come back this morning and *hopefully* finish the job. *prays*

Backed Up

Yup. That's what's happening in our pipes at home. Everything is BACKED UP. Last night a few minutes after Jason and Matthias took a shower, I went to get in and there was about 2 inches of water that had never drained. Jason went to the store to get some Drano. He came back, tried to pour it down and plunge the tub. No dice. So i went to go use the other shower we never use and to my dismay saw that it was half filled with what seemed to be dirty toilet water (ew) and the toilet had complete overflowed. EW. So while we were trying to clean up the mess in the hall bathroom, by the time we got back to the master bathroom that toilet had overflowed as well. NICE. By that point it was 11:30 so I faked a shower and washed my hair in the kitchen sink (which seemed to be really slow in draining as well) and "bathed" with a soapy washcloth. FUN!

Now we're waiting for a plumber. lalala

He luvs me

So last night after i got home from work after a long day and having to stay after work, I arrived to Jason telling me he was going to make dinner b/c his brother was coming over. I don't ming having Josh over for dinner, but him and Jason will then hang out afterwards in the garage drinking beer in their "SEcret Boys Club" as the girls and I have deemed it. Again, not a big deal, but then that leaves no time for me and Jason to spend together considering we have limited evening with his work schedule.

Once JOsh left I was all excited b/c then that meant that Jason and I could sit down and watch our regular Tuesday night t.v. line-up. But Jason said he needed to go to the store. WHAT. THE. FUCK. It was already 10:30 and I was tired and didn't want to wait up anymore. I told him (in a huff) "Fine. GO. WHatever." I tired to stay awake but ended up falling asleep on the couch. A few minutes later I awoke to him saying, "Wake up" and he was holding some roses and a card for our 2 month anniversary. I puffy heart him!!

weekend review

*yawn*

Last week seemed so tiresome. it was particularly busy at work so maybe thats why. Thursday night i attended a banquet for an organization we work with. the food was so yummy!! It was recognizing some scholarship recipients. A couple of them were going to Nepal to renovate a maharaja's hunting lodge to form a bed a breakfast to not only provide jobs for that village to bring in tourist revenue but the profits from the B&B would go to the local schools and hospitals. Anther kid was working with a company called nutty solutions. They worked to come up a with a "recipe" that was mixed with peanut butter and powdered milk and other ingredients that would go to help malnourished children in underdeveloped countries. They said the peanut butter really provided a good source of nourishment and was really inexpensive and this food didn't need to be refrigerated. I was really intrigued by this initiative.

Friday i went to an awards banquet for some students I work with. They had some GOOD jalapeno poppers. Sad how the highlight was a deep fried appetizer.
Saturday i went to a cocktail reception for work and then it was DATE NIGHT!!! Jason met me on campus and we went and saw Avenue Q. it was good. Puppets having sex made me laugh SO HARD. Especially when Kate monster gave Princeton a blow job and her head bobbed up and so fast! OMG. Then we attempted to have a late night dinner, but ended up going home and getting what-a-burger.

Sunday we went to pick up Matthias from the sitter. I was informed that a co=worker who has been ill for quite sometime had passed away early Sunday morning. She'd been progressively getting worse and worse and couldn't fight cancer as hard as she wanted to. I had gone to go see her a few weeks ago. We stayed a few minutes as she was barely audible and clearly needed rest. It was real tough to stand there and not cry. My God, she reminds me of my grandma in so many ways. Even the way she grabbed her drinking cup. Her hands, her fingernails.. made me flashback to my grandma lying sick in her bed not so long ago.

You know, some night,s I get really REALLY sad. I mean like REAL sad. I can't sleep and I don't know what to do My anxiety makes a reappearance. I feel so lost. I honestly do at times. Well a lot of the time. I know it hasn't been even a year yet, but I'm afraid to talk about it with people. I feel like at that time I didn't really get to feel anything about it. My mom suffers from depression so everyone was either telling me to be strong for her or for my child. So while I'm being strong for these individuals, when am I suppose to mourn? WHen am I supposed to feel? Matthias was sick at the time as well so that in itself was stressful. Then of course, there was/and still is the drama with the people who used to be my family as I have decided n my heart that they are not family as family doesn't do these things to each other. I have severed all ties with them. Then came the big decision on whether or not to postpone the wedding and we did. But then there was the wedding and wow that was time consuming. I did have to fight emotions with the realization that my grandparents would not be there. It was tough, but I think I hid it pretty well.

So here we are and it's April. And I'm still sad. I really still have to think to myself, "You WILL NOT talk to your grandmother again" I just feel like i haven't talked to her for a while b/c she's been sick and that it'll be ok b/c I'll talk to her soon. But I won't. And every day it's a harsh realization. Silly I'm sure. Silly for me to have to remind myself of that on a daily basis. So again, as I mentioned, it's April. 9 months later. can i cry about this to people? WIll people say, "veronica you should be over this by now." Or would they say, "Veronica, you have a child, you're a grown up. Deal with this. Stop your blubbering." I'm scared. it sucks, b/c I'm alone A LOT. i know most of us don't really go out anymore b/c we're unfortunately getting older and lamer as the years go by. But most of us have someone at home to go to. Yes, I have Jason, but when he works night and he's walking out the door as I arrive it SUCKS. When he's busy every other weekend b/c of his job it SUCKS. So i lie awake in the middle of the night and call until he goes on break and can talk to me and calm me down. But i really don't feel like i can talk about this. And most people don't know what to say anyway b/c really, who so far feels as thought they have list both parents? I hate going to pick up my brother and sit across the street from my grandparents empty house. it KILLS me inside. Most people don't know what that's like either. And is it stupid? For me to be upset about seeing their vacant house??? I don't know. I don't know a lot of things right now. Except for this hole in my heart that is still hurting and hasn't gotten any smaller.

On a lighter but still sad note... John Madden retired from commentating. SAD!! What the hell is football without John Madden???

Oh and Matthias got his hair cut this weekend. And it is WAY shorter than what I wanted. *pouts*

Good Friday

But it would be even better if we got off at noon. Just sayin...

Wednesday's Confession

I'm totally Uberly obsessed with the 90's at the current moment. Everyday, I settle on the couch and watch 2 dvr'd episodes of Beverly Hills 90210. Currently I'm in Season 2. Ahh how I love to reminisce. And I've been listening to 90's radio during my work day. :-D

Man, it's been a while...

So much has happened since I last posted. Bachelorette Party, Bridal Shower (which were both FABULOUS btw) and I got MARRIED!!

It was... an interesting day. The day started off with people running late. And then more people running late. And even more people running late. Although we were supposed to start at 4:00 I think we started closer to 5. Oopsie! And damn was it windy as HELL. My veil was flying ALL OVER THE PLACE. But it made for a few laughs. All in all it was a good day. My make up was FAB and my husband (weird! husband!) looked handsome. :o) My bridesmaids looked gorgeous. My flowers were beautiful. The place was well decorated. Just great.

I figured I needed to post something to get back in the swing of things. I'll have to catch up more later.